Uchiha "I Just Have Too Many Feelings" Sasuke (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
whatishate) wrote2014-08-30 02:03 am
whatishate) wrote2014-08-30 02:03 am
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uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
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day 60
Uchiha-san, I have a question I'd like to ask you.
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Kaworu.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
What is it?
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I was thinking about a conversation we had.
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
I thought about it a lot. I kept thinking about it.
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
Uchiha-san, what does hate feel like?
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Hate is the opposite of love.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
Hate is when you want, with all your heart, for something or someone to be out of your life. To be destroyed.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
To hate something is to be sickened by its very existence.
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FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
I see. Your answer makes sense to me. I didn't understand the word before. Thank you.
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As an angel, are you even capable of hatred?
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I think I hate someone.
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If you've never experienced hate, are you sure it's not just strong dislike of them or something they've done?
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I'm not sure. But reading your description of hate made me think that I understand what it feels like. It's familiar to me.
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
I don't like it. When I was younger, I felt love for everyone.
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Everyone's more naive when they're younger.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
They haven't had the chance to be hurt bad enough yet.
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Is being hurt what causes hatred?
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It's easier to hate when you're hurt, especially on the inside.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
Or if someone close to you is.
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FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
Someone close to me. That's why I feel it.
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Do you feel helpless?
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
Is there a physical ache in your chest as you know there's nothing you can do to stop something, or do you feel their pain as your own?
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
Do you want to destroy whatever's causing them to suffer?
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It makes me feel very tired. I have tried over and over again, because of this man.
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
And I will keep trying. No matter what. Until I succeed. Until I finally best him. Until I can make things right.
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
But I'm tired. I've never been so tired.
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I said hate was the opposite of love. What I should say is that they're two sides of the same coin.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
Together they're the strongest emotions any human can have.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
Banners will unite to save a city. Banners will unite to destroy a great evil.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
Both emotions will wear you down without you having to lift a finger.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
When something you love is taken from you, it can leave a well of hate in its place.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
Both can consume and destroy a person. Both can make them stronger.
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Lilin fight amongst each other. But, Lilin also fight alongside each other, because they hate the Angels. Every country unites in its fear and loathing. So, it must be that powerful.
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
And Lilin are afraid of each other, too. They hurt and kill one another.
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
It could be that I'm afraid of this man. Of his superiority to me.
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
But I want to erase him, and his influence over my fate.
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It's possible to want to destroy something and not hate it.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
Because you feel that it's necessary.
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Destruction ≠ hate?
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
Though, people destroy things when they desire change
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
And I do desire change.
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
And I do feel that it's necessary, for the sake of that person's happiness.
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There is someone I need to destroy.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
I don't hate them at all.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
But they'll stand in the way of change that I need to bring about, and I'll have to fight them to make my goals happen.
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Before I knew love, I was going to destroy Lilin. But I never hated Lilin.
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
Yet, when that was my intention, I didn't feel this sick.
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Because you didn't know love.
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Well, I would rather feel sick every day than be ignorant again.
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I can understand that.
FROM: uchiha.sasuke@cdc.org
It's good that you learned about those emotions in the order you did. It makes you more human.
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I will never be human, Uchiha-san.
FROM: nagisa.kaworu@cdc.org
But I will be their hope.
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